


Bye Bye “Papa Bear”

by ReleasingmyInsanity



Series: Stories from the Cabin [2]
Category: Fake News FPF
Genre: Episode Related, Fluff, Gratuitous Elvish, M/M, Married Couple, Mild emotional hurt/comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:27:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22596286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReleasingmyInsanity/pseuds/ReleasingmyInsanity
Summary: Jon comforts “Stephen” after his appearance on the April 19, 2017 episode of The Late Show to talk about Bill O’Reilly.
Relationships: "Stephen Colbert"/Jon Stewart
Series: Stories from the Cabin [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1609456
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Bye Bye “Papa Bear”

Jon wrapped his arms around his husband and held Stephen as he cried.

“I can’t believe it.” Stephen said, burying his face in Jon’s chest. “Bill O’Reilly is gone. Papa Bear is GONE.”

Jon stroked his hair, the gel keeping every strand in place felt stiff under his hand. Stephen usually didn’t bother with the hair gel anymore now that they were both off the air. But he always did it when he thought the other Stephen might need him to comment on the latest news. Something that had happened far more often than they would have expected.

“I know it’s hard,” Jon said softly. “But after what he did they couldn’t let him stay on the air.”

Stephen sniffled. “I know that. But Jon, I looked up to him. I wanted to be like him. And I was! I _was_ like him….” He trailed off.

“I was like him,” he repeated slowly, a look of horror dawning on his face. “I wasn’t…I wasn’t that bad was I? All the things I said, was I harassing people and not realizing it? Did I hurt people? Why did anyone work for me? Why did you marry me? I’m a horrible person.” Stephen talked faster and faster, words spilling over each other, becoming hysterical.

Jon held him tightly, kissing Stephen’s face and whispering reassurances.

“Why don’t you hate me, Jon?” Stephen asked finally, tear-filled eyes searching his face.

Jon looked at Stephen steadily. “Because you’re not like that. Yes, you’ve made mistakes. You’ve made lots of mistakes. But you’ve never done anything on purpose to hurt anyone. And you’ve always tried to do the right thing. You’re a good person, Stephen Colbert. You’re a good person and I love you.”

“Really?”

“Really. I wouldn’t have married you if you were really as bad as all that.” Jon rubbed his thumb over Stephen’s wedding ring. No longer a fake ring for a fake marriage. A real one, chosen with love, and with Elvish engraved on the inside, “ _Tye-melin_.” Jon’s ring was engraved with the response. “ _Nista_.”

Stephen’s other hand came up to rest on top of Jon’s. “What would I do without you?”

“Be back in the hills mining turds?”

Stephen laughed at that. “And suffering from dung lung.”

Jon smiled then. “I think you could use some ice cream. Hang on a second and I’ll get you a bowl of Americone Dream.”

Stephen grinned and sat up properly to let Jon up. “Oh boy! Hurry up!”

Jon started to head for the kitchen, then paused and looked back at Stephen. “About inviting him to live with us…”

**Author's Note:**

> I’m assuming here, that despite his statements to the contrary in the episode, “Stephen” is fully aware of the fact that O’Reilly deserved to be fired. He’s saying what he thinks the Nation wants to hear, but actually listening to Jon has been really good for him and he’s grown as a person. He knows harassment is wrong.
> 
> Elvish sources from here: https://www.elfdict.com/w/tye/mq, here: https://www.elfdict.com/wt/360806, and here: https://www.elfdict.com/wt/382709. Word order for Tye-melin from here: https://www.elfdict.com/wt/378762  
> Melin = I love  
> Tye = you or thee  
> Nista = I know  
> I can’t decide if Stephen would be disappointed in how little I have an opinion on TLOTR or excited that I spent a couple of hours figuring out Elvish for him.
> 
> I’m not really satisfied with the title but I got tired of trying to think of something better.
> 
> Disclaimer: I haven’t seen NEARLY all the Colbert Report content so if “Stephen” has hurt somebody on purpose, just assume that this is an AU where he hasn’t.


End file.
